Monday, May 2, 2011

Killing Time

(I have to write now even though I'm having a pile of works to be done. This feeling is killing me, so I need to let it out before I can continue on my work)

I'm tired of this study thing. I know myself as a person who will never give up, but I need to stand on the ground and realize that no matter how hard I try, I'll never succeed. Even more so when others do not have to try hard and still get the result. Sure, it's not too late, but this question always remain in my mid : "Is it still worth a try?".

I afraid when they come to me and ask why I fail to live up their expectation. Worse, if they blame myself of not working enough. What if I record my daily routine and see how much I've done. Will they accept my hard work?Nope. They demand result. Everyone demands result. The world demands result. If a sport team fails to win, their hard work don't matter at all. It's either success or failure. I've never heard about "partial success" or "partial failure". In this case, I'm a failure.

You know what, I lose trust on determination. So the answer is, "It's not worth it".

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Salam saudara,

Jangan putus asa...Jangan sesekali putus asa dengan rahmat Allah. Berdoa selalu padaNya. Mohonlah bimbingan dariNya.Pintalah bantuan dariNya. Dekatlah diri dengan Allah. Jika kita dekat dengan Allah, InsyaAllah Allah akan dekat dengan kita...

van der shraaf said...

Terima kasih :)